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Summative Project Report

Overall, I genuinely enjoyed writing about my chosen topic. As mentioned in my proposal, fear is something that is very personal to me; understanding it has been an interesting journey. I wouldn't say that my practical work has been fantastic, I spent quite a bit of potentially useful time engaging in external art events (not necessarily negative, but has impacted my outcome). This being said, I am pleased with how my final images produced for the experiment turned out. I hung the first image (66x66cm) in an exhibition and got mainly positive feedback, it felt rewarding to produce something that had influence outside the confines of university. My process researching and making notes happened almost simultaneously to my writing, I think this may have let me down as I didn't pre-prepare. I also must make a note to stop ripping pages out of my sketchbook to work on as although it makes it easier to scan it, it makes a huge mess! The primary research I under-did, especially the responses to my paintings, were particularly eye opening. Often during crits my work gets missed or the feedback is sparse, this time it was so direct and personal it gave a new sense of why I create the things I do. It is particularly easy as a creative to fall into an abyss of self doubt and dislike everything you create, I’ve never felt before now that my work could mean something to someone other than myself. I think I can say with full confidence that despite my time management not quite being down to pat, I have exceeded the previous two years of work. COP has never been my strong point as I struggle with a very low attention span and writing makes me feel a little stupid. This being said, I enjoyed this topic considerably more, and I think it showed. This project has propelled me into generally  considering how and why people act the way they do, alongside learning new things about myself. This has got me considering how I want to spend my time after graduation and I believe I want to take the path of supporting people with disability, even if just by raising money for select charities through exhibitions and performance nights.

External Responses to Practical Work (Experiment)

Support
Differ

Response 1:

"The use of black and white checker paths in both images conjure up feelings of duality, an internal debate. Ambiguity leading to anxiety. This is confirmed more in the first image with the use of sharp edges and a cloud surrounding the figure on the paths head. Feelings of being lost and confusion are also evoked from looking at the figure in image one as she is reaching for something she is unable to see while focusing on the thoughts lingering above her head with tears in her eyes."

Response 2:

"First image - This looks more like a confrontation, rather than there being a victim and an instigator of fear. The creatures look quite cute, and I don't really find them scary, though the hallucinogenic quality of the piece is definitely disorientating.

- The lack of colour in the second piece makes it immediately more daunting, the characters seem to operate on a 2 dimensional plain, giving a stronger sense of direction to the action. I feel like what makes this piece feel more frightening then the other are the subtle contradictions that exist within the suggested motions of the subjects on the dimension. For instance, the cat is pointing forward, but its weight seems as if it could topple backwards, the mosquitoes would act to counterbalance to the sense of direction across the painting, but the middle one isn't uniform with the others and slightly breaks this effect. Little moments like this halt the natural flow of the eye across left to right and subtly undermine the cohesion of the experience, and give the illustration a much more uncanny and unnerving quality."

Response 3:

I think the works, while not scary in themselves, do well to connote the overwhelming sensation that occurs in fear

The first image makes me feel uneasy and anxious, I can see the character isn't in their preferred situation, instead tormented by their surroundings, or their torment is embodied by their surroundings

Both images, to me, appear to be some form of nightmarish dreamscape. I like this because, other than tv and film or videogames, dreams/ nightmares are the only chance humans get at experiencing their worst fears, a type of catharsis man has spent thousands of years stripping from real life only to repurpose through film, tv and the mass media

Response 4:

As a psychologist I am particularly interested artistic interpretation of the primal emotions. Rather than systematically studying emotions, it is refreshing to see them laid bare by the artist, in all their raw and unconstrained splendour.

The first painting speaks to my fear of emotional instability. At the outset, the painting and its accompanying text direct me inwards, evoking a sense of fear as it is experienced internally, within the psyche. The insect-ridden border that separates myself from the outer world appears malleable rather than distinct and secure. Unbidden visitors that have exploited this malleability plague my psyche, and I, clearly distressed, attempt a balancing act to manage this emotional onslaught, only to be infected in the struggle.

Within the second painting I take on the standpoint of the girl, adrift in an external environment of fear; my only direction forward, as paved by my inner psyche, leads to its epicentre. Even my journey into this exotic darkness looks to be thwarted by unruly troublemakers. 

Because the second painting appears as an external, material reality, my sense of fear in response to it is lesser than in the first; there is room for action in the face of the exogenous adversity. The first painting however cripples my sense of agency as I am overwhelmed by its internal devastation.  

Response 5:

The first image makes me think of being trapped in a situation where Im surrounded by things that make me uncomfortable. Pretty fearful stuff. 

The second image makes me think of a weird dream where Im not really with it, maybe on some weird journey where I have no idea what lies ahead. Also pretty fearful stuff.

Proposal for Experiment

I intend to gage how my work might make the viewer react through a simple experiment. Looking the themes of social transmission, learned fear and observation of fear I am exploring in my writing, I have produced two paintings; one a commentary on a personal fear, and one a disorientating image with no context. For the first image I give a background explanation as to it context and a short quote lifted from my own diary which serves as inspiration. The first image is in colour and clearly shows a human woman, something I hope promotes relatability. The second image is in black and white and was produced during a moment of psychosis. There is no context to the image other than a note I wrote while in a state which simply read "cat with human hands". I have not provided this information to the subjects. The goal of this experiment is to discover if I can elicit a sense of fear through my art. However, more importantly, I hope the subjects will be able to identify themes from fear conditioning (second image) and fear observation (first image), as inspired by Ito and Bosch respectively; referenced in Chapter Three (Case Studies).

Below I have attached the document sent out to all who agreed to participate. Note; I believe the experiment may not be 100% accurate as I neglected to consider size of image. Where the images are comparatively small on screen, the original paintings are 66cmx66cm (first) and 56cmx76cm (second). The size of the images in person may have more of an intense effect.

Also, I incorrectly used the word "pretence" in the first sentence. Only one person noticed.

Text on document reads;

Please observe both paintings, they are similar in size and both comprise of acrylic on wooden board. They were both created under the pretence [context] of “fear”.

The first painting is a commentary on fears revolving around losing a sense of self when overstimulated either socially or environmentally. Specifically, the experience of physical disassociation. There is text alongside the image which reads;

“I remember being a child and lying in bed feeling like my arms were miles away from my centre, but simultaneously too close. The surface of my duvet felt soft and cushion-y yet like it concealed something hard and solid, akin to metal. I no longer get these feelings but occasionally it feels like

I am flailing around like viscose jelly and my surroundings are being zoomed in an out of focus at rapid speed. There are millions of bugs under my skin only exiting through my gums and the snakes in my skull render my thoughts foggy.”

There is no context or description alongside the second image, and no intention to explain. 

Given the information you have just received, please emotionally respond to both images separately. I am looking for a description of how they both make you feel in relation to the topic (fear). Please write as much or as little as you feel necessary.

All responses will be kept anonymous and recorded on a private blog to be assessed. If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to ask.

Thank you for your time, it is much appreciated.

Junji Ito

Why have I chosen Ito?
In my eyes, Ito is one of the most successful manga artists within the genre of horror. I'm particularly drawn to his narrative and short story dynamic.

Points to research;
- Narrative structure
- Creature design
- Endings/ conclusions
- The Hanging Balloons
- Uzumaki (longer series)
- The Enigma of Amigara Fault
- The unknown?

Images:

Bonus 2:"The Enigma of Amigara Fault" (阿弥殻断層の怪 Amigara dansō no kai)
Inital realse date (Japan); 
September 10, 2003 (1st ed.)
October 16, 2007 (2nd ed.)
ISBN 1-56931-995-2 (1st ed.)
ISBN 1-4215-1387-0 (2nd ed.)
Junji Ito

Hieronymus Bosch

Bosch is the king of dreamscape surrealism in my opinion! Im obsessed with this creepy little creatures and religious motifs. I want to look at The Garden of Earthly Delights in my essay, as it is the most prominent of his works. Mainly I want to focus on the 'hell' wing of this painting.

To cite:
Hemphill (journal)
Taschen (book- library)
Walter S. Gibson (book- library)

I'm Too Big! (Not Big Enough)

I feel too large! Sometimes space feels too small and I am a tall woman with bendy, pointy limbs. Here are some images to demonstrate my fear of being too big for my environment that I did with my finger on my ipod.